Hurt

i really don't know what to do anymore. Yesterday I was thinking about all the good things that have started coming my way, however, i was quick to keep out everything that is currently going wrong. Hmph. Well, considering that blood is thicker than water, I always assumed that this means EVERY family will be close. BUt now I'm starting to think otherwise. I mean, All I do with mine is argue. And fight. And scuffle. I don't know. It's like on saturday, for instance, me and my mom got in one of the biggest fights we have gotten into with each other in about a month, i would say. First, it started off with me always driving (go figure), then it worked its way up to me not having any REAL friends and no one really caring about me. I'm just being used by EVERY single PERSON i associate myself with (to put it plainly). Right after that argument, she went off somewhere in my car, probably to shop or something. and RiGhT after that, I went back to my room and i cried so hard, I couldn't breathe. YEs, i remember it very clearly. And it was something i was thinking about in the car on Sunday, driving bak with bobby from the BBQ. It sux, man. That day I kept putting my hands to my throat, praying for a gasp of air. I swear, she can hurt me so much more and deeper than anyone else i know. She knows just the words to say to make me feel like shit. I mean, JUST like it. Why does it have to be this way? I don't know. I have yet to figure it out. Its just really taking its toll on me. That's why i've been working so much. Just so that i'm not at home. (not to mention that i like to have money, u feel me?) well. I think u get the idea. I'm just tired of being hurt.....